Peewee Peter Bird.
By Uncle Monty.
Graphics By Alex Albion.
Peewee Peter Bird of The Big Issue
is the little brother of redneck Anthony
John Bird. The sibling pair love the homeless
only for the money they rake in and in the
name of helping such poor devils. Almost
all the paid office and magazine staff the Bird
Brothers have hired have never been homeless,
however. Some of them have a condescending
and snotty-nosed attitude towards those
who are vendors like I found with the young
and morose staffer called Adam. He thinks he's
above such people as he stands glaring from the
Big Issue distribution spot at Covent Garden
looking down on such vendors as they come and
go to buy their daily or weekly stock. Adam
is basically an ignoramus and a glorified punk!
Most of all such staffers are lefties, politically
and socially. Many have worthless college
degrees in the soft sciences like sociology and
social work. And, few if any of them have
friends that are homeless or have been home-
less. They live in their cocoon of liberalism
and British socialism. Hardly one of them
knows a darn thing about homelessness
and marginalization. Yet, they seemingly
represent The Big Issue as if somehow
they do! But in reality, they
don’t and probably never will.
Peter Bird goes out into the outer regions
of London to sign up and badge new vendors
(mostly gypies, foreigners and Romanian
women) and to sort out problems with them
at which he is a law unto himself. He comes
over like he’s on some power trip, which
of course he is when he deals with such
vendors on the street.
Peewee has little or no grace in his mannerism
and personal persona. A little dinky bird in
little dinky bird cage, vile Peter Bird thinks
he’s a Big Dickie Bird at The Big Issue HQ at
London’s Vauxhall. “He prances around there
like he’s big shit,” remarked a former staffer
to me the other day as we sat down together
to discuss some of the past and recent ins
and outs of The Bird Brothers and their self-
made street sheet called The Big Issue.
The last time Peter Bird had any thing
to say to me he complained, did peewee,
about my blog saying: “You never say any-
thing good about The Big Issue.” True then
and even truer now after the sod then cap-
riciously suspended me last May from my
five-year Big Issue pitch for “bringing the
Big Issue into disrepute.” Standing next to
peewee was Dickhead Martin, one of the
staffers almost ready to lay down his life
for the Bird scumbags that they are.
Origin of PEEWEE. First Known Use: 1806.
Synonyms: diminutive, midget, mite, dwarf,
Tom Thumb. Also modern usage of the
word Peewee: a male
who tends to pee in
his pants; a tyrant bird like the American
flycatcher; a gaybo -or bi male
like Peewee Herman.
With his pitch just a stone's throw
from London's Trafalger Square and
Charing Cross Station, Vendor No. 401
does a daily skit and dance to get would-
be customers to buy The Big Issue.
The image here of him was taken from
the upper deck of the No. 11 bus ...
If the mere mention of Peter Bird’s stinking
name gets me angry, then the slighest mention
of the Big Issue’s Tom Woolock leaves me darn
right cold. Shown below, he’s the troubled hubby
of Samantha Woolock who is the distributor
at London’s Covent Garden of The Big Issue
to the vendors there.
Tom from time to time does the same, but
he’s oftentimes contemptuous of the vendors
he supposedly serves. He, like Sam, has ex-
perienced homeless and substance abuse.
Much like the foul-mouth git Steve Farrell
Wood, Tom Woolock "doesn’t know
shit from shinola" to use a crude Yankee
phrase. He can be totally surly like so
many others I have encountered in my
dealings with the oddball and careless
characters at The Big Issue.
I’m told nasty Tom speaks fluent Italian among
his few achievements in life aside from being a
birth dad of one teenage son. What I’ve seen
of Tom Woolock, I don’t like and it’s a
pretty mutual thing. "A Nasty Piece of Work"
is the upcoming title about Tom Woolock by
me. Look out for it! It will be an interesting
and damning piece about him ...
The Big Issue's Tom Woolock.
Now Back to Peewee Peter Bird.
Ironically, I’ve never seen the sibling pair
together as the Bird Brothers – it must be
quite a ghastly sight!! Nor have I ever seen
a photograph of the pair together. Maybe in
the Bird family photo album they have private
images of themselves together? But who knows
and who cares? Not me! That's all for now
folkz although I have much more in store
to tell you all during the coming year ...
:: Feedback & Comments ::
Web Awards. By Uncle Monty.
I don't give much value to web awards that
have included three from last year and the
latest one of 2011 just a day or so from out of
the blue. In all, I have won perhaps 10 or
12 web awards over the years of
writing on the net.
I don't seek any recognition or awards what-
soever for me and my blogs no matter how
good the intentions are of the awarders. I
don't understand why they send them for
they're worthless and a waste of time to me.
The only good such does for me is to know
that some folkz in cyberspace appreciate
what I do. I write for the pure satisfaction
of it all, not to get a pat on the back or to
let such go to my head.
There are of course those who literally
hate and detest me for what I write
critically about them. So be it! I'm
sure some of them are actually reading
my stuff now and getting all mad about
what I state. I make no apology for what
I write since I believe such to be true and
what I personally think whether or not
anybody agrees with me. All I truly wish
is that I could be a great writer. But alas
such is not to be! No amount of awards
can make up for that ... Whatever, I
will continue to freely write come hell or
high water especially against all that's
bad and fake about The Big Issue.
Your's, Uncle Monty.
+The Conversion of St. Paul, 2011.
Collected Dog Stories.
By Rudyard Kipling.
Illustrations By G. L. Stampa.
Edited By Uncle Monty.
Of Kipling. By Uncle Monty.

No comments: